exhausted

it does not look like B will be coming home tomorrow. He can not sit up for more than a few minutes and has not really mastered the stairs, so even if he were able to sit in the car for the trip home he would not be able to get upstairs to the bedroom. I think it is therefore likely to be Monday, which even though I would like him home now, the thought is a bit frightening. I don't think either of us thought it would take this much out of him.

I also didn't think it would take as much out of me.....I am exhausted. I am not the independent women I thought I was - I am not sleeping well (once I get to sleep, that is), the house is a bit of a mess, I've eaten junk all week, and have not managed to get any study done which puts me about a week and a half behind. I actually had great expectations for this week, I was going to do shorter hours at work, and take Tuesday off altogether, this would enable me to visit with B on my way to and from work and still have time to keep the house clean, give time to the pets, and study. So how did I go? I worked the shorter hours and took Tuesday off, but I didn't get in to see B every morning and had to leave early (before visiting hours ended at 8.pm) Wednesday evening because I could barely keep my eyes open, and I wasn't much better today.

I didn't feel too bad leaving early tonight though, B had a lot of visitors (my mum and dad, the other B, Alistair H, A and the girls, Natski, Twisty, and me) throughout the day/afternoon and was pretty worn out. This was on top of the early morning and painful ultrasound, 2 visits from the physio, nurses taking blood pressure and doing other stuff, and the endless stream of hospital staff bringing trays, cleaning the room and other general fussing.

Since I don't know where I am going with all of this, goodnight! and Again thank you to all who have visited, sent flowers, telephoned, emailed, sms'd, and said prayers. It has really helped. 'Nite.