18 August, 2007

A sad day, and a tense week ahead...

Some sections of this post may make those with weak stomach, a little ill. Please accept our apologies..


Now on with the post...

On Friday, we had to be a the Northern clinic early (7.20am) and to save time, we decided to stay at the in-laws as opposed to fight the morning peak. We arrived a little early and parked out on the street. It is amazing what you see outside an IVF clinic once you have been through the process. Guys walking in with a little brown paper bag, and some very sad ladies walking out shedding a tear. Today, it would be our turn to walk out, not so much with a tear as these will be shed later in the day, but with both optimism, hope and and despair.

You see, this morning we were to have an ultrasound to show, either conclusively pregnant or not. The blood tests over the last week had not shown the appropriate levels of Beta HCG development, although a positive result. This should double with every day. In our case, it was slowly going up.

With a sheet covering the embarrassing bits, and a 'rubber' over the scanning tool, the doctor started to investigate what was happening. He was able to find and show clearly, L's uterus, which had a very clear black egg shape in the middle. This is good I thought... He went on to say what we were looking at, and that he would want to see at this stage, a fetal heart beat (at 6 weeks). he needed to 'zoom in', as if he wasn't already 'in' enough! He was now able to see the contents of the 'pregnancy sac' and that he could see clearly a 'yolk' sac within, but still no heart beat. This was not looking good. L was being considerably stoic, I am proud of you L.

The Dr then went to measure the pregnancy sac, and it only measured to be 4 weeks, instead of the 6.5 weeks he estimated it should be according to the implantation date. Discussions were held, and whilst he believes this will not be a viable pregnancy, he is willing to give it the best possible chance and re-scan in another week. If nature does not take it's predicted course by then, then L will be 'booked in' and a clean out will be ordered. A follow up attempt will be done in about a month from now...

L is very upset about all of this, whilst I am trying to be positive. The one thing that I clearly remember the Dr saying was, I am extremely happy with the fact that I can get you pregnant. I remember this because really, I got her pregnant, it was MY 'swimmers' and her egg after all!!! So, how did we cheer each other up? We went shopping of course! We went into Myer, and fond two tops for L. These not only looked fantastic on her, but the second one was on the rack in the change rooms, a complete compulsive buy! The remainder of the day was to be a car trip over to the EG Waterhouse National Camellia Garden, to which, I will post a multi-photo, Wordless Wednesday dedicated to the day.

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