04 September, 2007

A sad, SAD day today...

Wordless Wednesday next post down...

As has been previously mentioned, we have been doing the whole IVF thing, and had an implantation done on the 16th July, which would make it now 9 weeks pregnant for L (7 weeks, + 2 weeks growing the Follicle makes 9 weeks).

After the initial blood test showed a positive for a pregnancy, a subsequent blood test (original Beta-hCG levels were lower than expected) showed it to be growing, all beit slow, so an ultrasound was ordered by the specialist to investigate as to what was going on.

Two weeks ago, the ultrasound showed everything that should be there, except a foetal heartbeat as it should have been there by this stage. His words were that he did not expect this to be a viable pregnancy, but I will re-scan you again in a week. The 'pregnancy sac' was underdeveloped at just 4 weeks...

A follow up scan show that there was some development, which surprised the specialist somewhat, and that the pregnancy sac had indeed grown to the size that it should. Heck, there was even a foetal heartbeat this time! But still he remained sceptical about the situation and wanted to do another scan in around 10 days. Problem was, he was leaving to go to France for the Rugby World Cup (I can now see how they can afford such luxury's with the way they charge and the return visits)!

So this morning, after staying over at L's parents place as it is close to the clinic, we headed off for hopefully the last scan not to mention some good news. L was now getting pretty sick of dropping her pants for men other than me. The procedure used is an internal ultrasound where a condom is placed over the scanning tool and inserted. Almost as soon as it was in, I could see what was about to come. All I could see, now remember that I am a mere Greenkeeper, was the uterus wall and a black 'hole' if you like in the middle. Last time, there was a flashing heartbeat in there, and this time, there was not...

Needless to say, that L is devastated. She was quite stoic whilst in the clinic with the specialist, and even to the point of driving to her car (it was parked elsewhere so as we did not have to find two car parks near the clinic which is very rare), but as I started to leave, I could see that she was upset, so I went back and caught the tears...

So, what next? She is booked in for a cruet, hopefully next Monday, and we will start the whole process over again. The time however will have to be calculated out, as we are in the process of booking a trip over to Auckland Botanic Gardens for the Ellerslie Flower Show. I know that this will cheer her up, we had a great time last year, and I know that it will be that way again. She needs to simple stop, rest and de-stress!

Sorry for the long post, and cheer up L. I love you...

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